Just in Case...Finding Professional Help (JIC)

Families faced with the problem of a missing or sexually exploited child may benefit from the help of a knowledgeable and experienced professional. In missing-child cases of all types, parents may need to call upon the services of a qualified and experienced therapist to help them deal with the family stress during the missing event, child recovery and family reunification, or the grieving process if the child is recovered deceased. In family-abduction cases in particular, the searching parent will need an attorney to assist in filing a civil legal action, recovering the child, and ensuring that law enforcement bring the abductor parent to justice. In cases of child sexual exploitation and abuse, therapists and physicians are helpful both in diagnosing that abuse took place and treating the problems caused by the abuse.

The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children, in cooperation with the National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse and the Center for the Study of Trauma at the University of California at San Francisco, has compiled these guidelines for parents on finding professionals—therapists, physicians, and attorneys— to assist in treating and resolving cases of missing or exploited children.

Counseling in Cases of Missing or Exploited Children

Child disappearance for any reason—whether a nonfamily abduction, family abduction, or runaway episode—is a loss that usually creates extreme stress within families. Parents and the other children in the family may experience anxiety, fear, sadness, anger, or guilt. While there may be little prior life experience to prepare families for this traumatic event, each family develops its own way of coping. In some instances, the other children in the family may be forgotten or ignored due to all of the attention being given to the missing child. You may choose to rely on your own resources along with the support of relatives and friends. Other families, however, may find that counseling can give family members the opportunity to express and better cope with their thoughts and feelings about the disappearance, reorganize family responsibilities, and keep communication open during a difficult and often painful period.

Every family with a missing child hopes for a successful recovery. This recovery, however, is only the first part of a family reunification process. The family and the recovered child will need to discuss their experiences during the missing event and then begin to rebuild family life. Because the experiences of child victims of nonfamily abduction, family abduction, or a runaway episode may be very different, the tasks of the family and the recovered child during reunification may vary.

If your child has been abducted by a nonfamily member, reunification counseling should begin with an evaluation of the impact of the missing event upon both your family and child, as well as an assessment of your coping efforts. Nonfamily abductions frequently involve physical, sexual, or psychological abuse of the child. Your child may have been told that family members who were “left behind” were dead or that they no longer wanted the child. Efforts will have to be made to reassure your child that the separation was involuntary and overcome your child’s possible feelings of alienation. Family members need to be patient with the child during the reunification process. While family counseling fosters the communication essential to rebuilding family life, individual counseling of the child may be necessary to address fears and traumatic experiences your child may be reluctant to express in a family setting. In cases of extreme tragedy in which your child dies while missing, your family will need counseling to help cope with the grief and other feelings. At some point, support groups may be helpful to you by joining with others who have experienced a similar loss.

If your child has been abducted by the noncustodial parent, reunification counseling may need to address the child’s feelings of separation or loss from the abductor parent. The custodial parent may find it difficult to talk with the child about such feelings, in light of his or her own anxiety or anger toward the abducting parent. Counseling can make it easier for such reactions to be discussed.

The act of running away usually results from a combination of unresolved family problems and individual problems. Counseling can be helpful in identifying these issues, reducing the impact of the problems, and preventing future runaway incidents. Counseling should address all events that occurred during the runaway incident, as runaway children are at high risk for substance abuse, sexual exploitation, and sexual and physical abuse. Your child may have left a situation within the home or in some other area of his or her life that the parents may not know about. It is important to allow your child to acknowledge these contributing factors and for the family to address the problems that drove the child to run away in the first place. If these issues are not addressed, the child may become a habitual runaway.

When a child has been sexually exploited or abused, the child should be seen by a therapist as soon as possible after disclosing the abuse. Therapy can help your child understand that he or she is not to blame and can help him or her cope with the overwhelming feelings of guilt and shame that some children have. While physical evidence of sexual abuse is often lacking, have your child examined by a physician to make sure that he or she has not been physically injured during the abuse. If law enforcement or childprotective services have not already taken your child to a therapist or physician as part of the investigation, you should seek such a professional on your own. A child who appears to be coping with the abuse initially may not have come to grips with what happened or may be in denial. Children may only tell part of the story about abuse until they feel comfortable and secure enough to disclose the whole story. Seek referrals for qualified individuals from the other professionals who are helping you.

Finding a Therapist or Physician

In order to be helpful to you, a therapist or physician needs to have training and experience in dealing with child-sexual exploitation and abuse or issues related to family reunification. Most states have a child-protection team composed of trained professionals who investigate cases of abuse and who make recommendations for intervention.

What to Look For in a Therapist

Your therapist should have an advanced degree in a recognized mental-health specialty such as psychiatry, psychology, social work, counseling, or psychiatric nursing. Advanced degrees are master’s degrees (M.S.W., M.S., M.A.) and doctorates (M.D., Ph.D., Psy.D.). Make sure that your therapist is licensed to practice as a therapist in your state.

In cases of missing children, your therapist should have specific knowledge about the consequences to the child and family following child disappearance, legal issues surrounding child search, and child recovery and family reunification. Therapists with proper degrees and credentials who lack this specific knowledge may be useful if they are willing to seek educational material on the subject. NCMEC has a publication, titled Recovery and Reunification of Missing Children: A Team Approach, that may be helpful to the professionals who are working with the missing child and his or her family.

In cases of child-sexual abuse and exploitation, your therapist should have special training in child-sexual abuse and exploitation, know how it affects children and adults, understand how to place responsibility on the abuser, and have a treatment plan.

What to Look For in a Physician

Your physician should have board certification in a relevant medical specialty such as pediatrics, family practice, or obstetrics/ gynecology. Board certification means that the doctor has had specific training and experience in that area of medicine after medical school and then passed an examination in that specialty.

Your physician should have particular experience in conducting medical evaluations of children for sexual abuse and exploitation. Child-sexual abuse and exploitation cases may involve complex issues about diagnosis, evidence collection, and treatment for sexually transmitted diseases.

In cases of child-sexual abuse or exploitation, your therapist or physician should have knowledge about the legal issues involved in child-sexual abuse and exploitation (especially the laws about reporting child-sexual victimization), procedures used by law enforcement and protective services, evidence, and expert testimony in your state. If you find that you need a therapist or physician with knowledge of or experience in testifying in court about your child’s assessment and treatment, consult with a prosecutor or other attorney. Many states have now established child-advocacy centers that provide all of the above-referenced services under one roof. Check with your law-enforcement agency or child-protective-services agency to see if a child-advocacy center is in your community.

Where to Find a Therapist or Physician

Many communities have special programs for treating child-sexual abuse and exploitation or have therapists with experience in certain areas. As services to families of missing children represent a relatively new field, however, it may be difficult to find therapists with this specialized training in your community. You may find reputable therapists in your community through the organizations noted below.

Nonprofit service providers serving families of missing or exploited children

Local psychological or psychiatric association referral services

University departments of psychology or psychiatry

Child-abuse hotlines

Child-protective-services agencies

Rape-crisis or sexual-assault centers

Family-court services of court-appointed, special-advocate (CASA) groups

Crime-victim-assistance programs in the law-enforcement agency or prosecutor’s (district attorney’s) office

Dealing with Your Therapist or Physician

When you have located a therapist or physician, it is reasonable to ask about his or her experience and training in dealing with a particular problem. If you are not satisfied, find another professional. Even if you pay a reduced fee or receive services at no cost, you have the right to have a therapist or physician with the proper training and experience. You may wish to express a preference for a male or female therapist or physician.

Discuss your child’s situation openly, completely, and honestly. Trust your feelings and your child’s feelings. You and your child should feel comfortable with the therapist or physician, even if the examination or assessment process creates feelings of guilt or shame. If you are not comfortable with your therapist or physician, discuss this discomfort openly. If this discussion does not produce positive change, request another therapist or physician.

Provide a complete history so that the professional can properly assess and treat your child. Try to cooperate as fully as possible and help the child cooperate with the therapist or physician. Ask questions if you do not understand what is happening. Be open and candid in providing information to the therapist about your child and your family. This information may be helpful in formulating a treatment plan.

Discuss the fees for examination, and find out what is covered by health-insurance benefits that you may have. Ask for a written statement that explains the basis for charges. Your law-enforcement agency or district attorney’s office can tell you if your state has a crime-victim-assistance program that will pay for necessary counseling and medical treatment.

During an investigation of child-sexual abuse or exploitation, or during therapy or the medical exam, you may be told that there is no evidence of victimization. There may be many reasons for the lack of evidence, but this does not mean that your child may not have been sexually victimized. And, conversely, behavioral changes may have been due to causes other than sexual abuse such as a medical, family, or school problem.

Even though no physical evidence was found, the therapist or physician may still be able to testify in court about the evaluation and discuss the fact that your child was abused. It is important for the therapist to continue seeing your child, even if the court does not find that sexual abuse or exploitation occurred.

Note: All medical professionals and therapists have a code of ethics that they must follow. It is always wrong for any professional to be abusive or act in a sexual way with a client. If you believe that your therapist or physician is acting inappropriately or is not keeping you informed about the assessment and treatment, discuss your concerns openly. If this discussion does not produce positive change, talk to his or her supervisor or contact a professional or medical association for more help. Do not stay in a therapy situation that makes you or your child uncomfortable.

Finding an Attorney

The services of an attorney may be helpful at any time during the investigation of a case of a missing or exploited child, but they are particularly important if you are facing one of the situations noted below.

Your child is the victim of family abduction, and you need to obtain a custody order, file criminal charges against the abductor, and encourage law enforcement to investigate and the prosecutor to prosecute. Note: If your child was taken to another state, you may have to hire a second attorney to enforce the custody decree in the state to which your child was taken.

You are considering separation, divorce, or dissolving a nonmarital partnership and want to prevent a family abduction. Or, you want to stop visitation or are considering separation or divorce because your child discloses sexual abuse or exploitation. Whether or not you are legally married, you should obtain legal custody of your child. To obtain a custody order, you must file legal papers, called pleadings, in the family court. It will be much simpler to do this if you get the assistance of an attorney.

You want to sue someone who sexually abused or exploited your child.

You want to sue an agency or institution that failed to protect your child from sexual victimization.

Note: You do not need an attorney merely because your child is testifying in a criminal case regarding abduction or sexual exploitation. You can inquire whether or not your child will be appointed a guardian ad litem or courtappointed special advocate to assist in the court process. Your child may also receive assistance from a victim-witness advocate through the state prosecutor’s office. You may want to consult an attorney, however, if you have questions that the prosecutor or these other professionals cannot answer.

What to Look For in an Attorney

Missing-child cases and cases of child-sexual abuse and exploitation can have complex legal issues. Parents should consider the items noted below when hiring an attorney.

Legal advice should come only from an attorney.

Your attorney should be licensed to practice in the state where the case arose, and/ or where any trial is likely to occur. Only a lawyer licensed in that jurisdiction will know the laws that will apply in order to advise and represent you competently.

If your child is missing, your attorney should be familiar with criminal parental kidnapping laws, the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction Act (UCCJA), the Parental Kidnapping Prevention Act (PKPA), and child-abduction lawsuits.

If your child has been sexually exploited or abused, your attorney should be familiar with child-abuse and neglect investigations, the laws about custody and visitation, and new procedures that may be used in trials when a child is a witness. If a parent has been involved in the abuse, there may be issues surrounding child custody and visitation.

Your attorney should be experienced in conducting trials, especially trials in criminal and family court. For example, cases regarding child-sexual abuse and exploitation may require complex pretrial and trial procedures.

Your attorney should be honest with you about the case. He or she should represent your interests vigorously. Moreover, your attorney should treat you and your child with courtesy and respect.

Where to Find an Attorney

The agencies and organizations noted below may be able to help you find an attorney.

Nonprofit service providers serving families of missing and exploited children

Lawyer-referral services of the local or state bar association

Legal aid office, if you think that you are financially eligible for free representation

Dealing With Your Attorney

After you have identified one or more attorneys close to your home, call for an initial consultation. This is usually not expensive, and sometimes it is free. Describe your situation openly, completely, and honestly. An attorney is not allowed to reveal what you say to him or her during your discussions, even if you later choose a different attorney to represent you. You should provide all the facts so that your attorney can properly advise and represent you. Ask about your attorney’s experience and training and, if you are not satisfied with the answers, discuss them further or seek another attorney.

Trust your feelings, and choose an attorney with whom you feel comfortable. When you have decided upon an attorney, discuss the attorney’s fees and court costs, and ask for a written statement that explains the basis for charges. If the attorney quotes an hourly fee instead of a total charge, ask for an estimated total based upon past cases. Request a copy of each document and correspondence that your attorney prepares on your case.

Note: If you have a complaint against your attorney, first try to resolve it with a frank and open discussion. Remember that every case has a “winner” and a “loser”; you may be disappointed in the outcome of the case even though your attorney represented you competently and vigorously. If you believe that your attorney acted unethically, you may make a complaint to the state bar association.

National Center for Missing & Exploited Children

The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC), established in 1984 as a private, nonprofit organization, serves as a clearinghouse of information on missing and exploited children; provides technical assistance to the public and law-enforcement agencies; offers training programs to law-enforcement and social-service professionals; distributes photographs and descriptions of missing children worldwide; coordinates child-protection efforts with the private sector; networks with nonprofit service providers and state clearinghouses on missing-person cases; and provides information on effective legislation to help ensure the protection of children per 42 USC § 5771 and 42 USC § 5780.

A 24-hour, toll-free telephone line, 1-800-THE-LOST (1-800-843-5678), is available in the United States and Canada for those who have information on missing and exploited children. The toll-free number when dialing from Mexico is 001-800-843-5678, and the “phone free” number when dialing from Europe is 00-800-843-5678. The CyberTipline for online reporting is available worldwide at www.cybertipline.com. The TDD line is 1-800- 826-7653. The NCMEC business number is 703-224-2150. The NCMEC facsimile number is 703-274-2200. The NCMEC web-site address is www.missingkids.com.

Prepared by the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC); the National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse; and the Center for the Study of Trauma, University of California, San Francisco. Many thanks to Daniel D. Broughton, M.D., Mayo Clinic; David Lloyd, J.D., formerly with the National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse; the late Christopher Hatcher Ph.D., Loren Brooks, Ph.D., and Cole Barton, Ph.D., Center for the Study of Trauma, University of California at San Francisco; John B. Rabun, A.C.S.W., NCMEC; and Michelle P. Spring, formerly with NCMEC.

The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC), a national clearinghouse and resource center, is funded under Cooperative Agreement #98-MC-CX-K002 from the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention, Office of Justice Programs, U.S. Department of Justice.

The National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse is an information, training, and technical assistance center designed for all professionals working in the field of child-sexual abuse and is funded with the support of Grant #90-CA- 1359 from the National Center on Child Abuse and Neglect, Office of Human Development Services, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.

At the time this brochure was written, the Center for the Study of Trauma was the only university center devoted to the study of abduction and disappearance. The Center’s research implements a systematic approach which recognizes that problems of abduction and disappearance require analyses from the perspectives of psychology, criminal law, civil law, and sociology.

Points of view or opinions in this work are those of the authors and do not necessarily represent the official position or policies of the U.S. Department of Justice or U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. National Center for Missing & Exploited Children^® is a registered service mark of the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children.


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