Just in Case...Guidelines
in finding professional help in case your child is missing or the victim
of sexual exploitation
Families faced with the problem of a missing or sexually exploited child
may benefit from the help of a knowledgeable and experienced professional.
In missing-child cases of all types, parents and guardians may need to
call on the services of a qualified and experienced therapist to help
them address family stress during the missing event, child recovery and
family reunification, or grieving process if the child is recovered deceased.
In family-abduction cases in particular, the searching parent or guardian
will need an attorney to assist in filing a civil legal action, recovering
the child, and ensuring law enforcement brings the abductor parent/guardian
to justice. In cases of child sexual exploitation therapists and physicians
are helpful both in diagnosing exploitation took place and treating the
problems caused by the exploitation.
The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children has compiled these guidelines
for parents and guardians when needing to find professionals — therapists,
physicians, and attorneys — to assist in treating and resolving cases of
missing or sexually exploited children. These guidelines were originally compiled
in cooperation with the National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse and Center
for the Study of Trauma at the University of California at San Francisco.
Counseling in Cases of Missing Children
Child disappearance for any reason — whether a nonfamily abduction,
family abduction, or runaway episode — is a loss that usually
creates extreme stress within families. Parents, guardians, and the other
children in the family may experience anxiety, fear, sadness, anger,
or guilt. While there may be little prior life experience to prepare
families for this traumatic event, each family develops its own way of
coping. In some instances the other children in the family may be forgotten
or ignored due to all of the attention being given to the missing child.
You may choose to rely on your own resources along with the support of
relatives and friends. Other families, however, may find counseling gives
family members the opportunity to express and better cope with their
thoughts and feelings about the disappearance, reorganize family responsibilities,
and keep communication open during a difficult and often painful period.
Every family with a missing child hopes for a successful recovery. This
recovery, however, is only the first part of a family reunification
process. The family and recovered child will need to discuss their
experiences during the missing event and then begin to rebuild family
life. Because the experiences of child victims of a nonfamily abduction,
family abduction, or runaway episode may be very different, the tasks
of the family and recovered child during reunification may vary.
If your child has been abducted by a nonfamily
member, reunification counseling should begin with an evaluation
of the impact of the missing event on both your family and child, as well
as an assessment of your coping efforts. Nonfamily abductions frequently
involve physical, sexual, or psychological abuse of the child. Your child
may have been told family members who were “left behind” were dead or no longer wanted him
or her. Efforts will have to be made to reassure your child that the separation
was involuntary and overcome your child’s possible feelings of alienation.
Family members need to be patient with the child during the reunification process.
While family counseling fosters the communication essential to rebuilding family
life, individual counseling of your child may be necessary to address fears and
traumatic experiences he or she may be reluctant to express in a family setting.
In cases of extreme tragedy in which your child dies while missing, your family
will need counseling to help cope with grief and other feelings. At some point it
may be helpful to join a support group with others who have experienced a similar
loss.
If your child has been abducted by the noncustodial parent or guardian,
reunification counseling may need to address the child’s feelings of separation
from or loss of the abductor parent/guardian. The custodial parent/guardian may
find it difficult to talk with the child about such feelings in light of his
or her own anxiety or anger toward the abducting parent/guardian. Counseling
may make it easier for such reactions to be discussed.
If your child has run away, counseling may be helpful
in identifying why he or she left home. The act of running away usually
results from a combination of unresolved family problems and individual
problems. Counseling may also help reduce the impact of the problems and
prevent future runaway incidents. Counseling should address all events
that occurred during the runaway incident, as runaway children are at high
risk for substance abuse, sexual exploitation, and physical abuse. Your
child may have left a situation within the home or in some other area of
his or her life the parents or guardians may not know about. It is important
to allow your child to acknowledge these contributing factors and for the
family to address the problems that drove the child to run away in the
first place. If these issues are not addressed, the child may become a
habitual runaway.
Counseling in Cases of Sexually Exploited Children
When a child has been sexually exploited the child should be seen by
a therapist as soon as possible after disclosing the exploitation. Therapy
may help your child understand he or she is not to blame and may help
him or her cope with the overwhelming feelings of guilt and shame some
children have. While physical evidence of sexual exploitation is often
lacking, have your child examined by a physician to make sure he or she
has not been physically injured . If law enforcement or child-protective
services have not already taken your child to a therapist or physician
as part of the investigation, you should seek such a professional on
your own. A child who appears to be coping with the exploitation initially
may not have come to grips with what happened or may be in denial. Children
may tell only a part of what happened until they feel comfortable and
secure enough to disclose more details. Seek referrals for qualified
individuals from the other professionals who are helping you.
Finding a Therapist or Physician
In order to be helpful to you, a therapist or physician needs to have
training and experience in handling child sexual exploitation or issues
related to family reunification. Many jurisdictions have a child-protection
team composed of trained professionals who investigate cases of exploitation
and make recommendations for intervention.
What to Look For in a Therapist
-
Your therapist should have an advanced degree in a recognized mental-health
specialty such as psychiatry, psychology, social work, counseling,
or psychiatric nursing. Advanced degrees are master’s degrees
(M SW, MS, MA) and doctorates (M D, PhD, PsyD). Make sure your therapist
is licensed to practice in your jurisdiction.
- In cases of missing children your therapist should have specific
knowledge about the consequences to the child and family following
child disappearance, legal issues surrounding child search, and
child recovery and family reunification. Therapists with proper
degrees and credentials who lack this specific knowledge may be
useful if they are willing to seek educational material about the
subject.
- In cases of child sexual exploitation your therapist should have
special training in child sexual exploitation, know how it affects
children and adults, understand how to place responsibility on the
exploiter, and have a treatment plan.
What to Look For in a Physician
- Your physician should have board certification in a relevant medical
specialty such as pediatrics, family practice, or obstetrics/ gynecology.
Board certification means the doctor has had specific training and
experience in that area of medicine after medical school and then passed
an examination in that specialty.
- Your physician should have particular
experience in conducting medical evaluations of children for sexual
exploitation. Child-sexual -exploitation cases may involve complex
issues about diagnosis, evidence collection, and treatment for sexually
transmitted diseases.
In cases of child sexual exploitation your therapist or physician should
have knowledge of the legal issues involved in child sexual exploitation
, especially the laws about reporting child sexual victimization ; procedures
used by law enforcement and protective services ; the rules of evidence
; and the use of expert testimony in your jurisdiction. If you find you
need a therapist or physician with knowledge of or experience in testifying
in court about your child’s assessment and treatment, consult with
a prosecutor or other attorney. Many jurisdictions have now established
child-advocacy centers providing all of the above-referenced services under
one roof. Check with your law-enforcement agency or child-protective-services
agency to see if a child-advocacy center is in your community.
Where to Find a Therapist or Physician
Many communities have special programs for treating child sexual exploitation
or therapists with experience in certain areas. As services to families
of missing children represent a relatively new field, however, it may
be difficult to find therapists with this specialized training in your
community. You may find reputable therapists in your community through
the organizations noted below.
- Nonprofit -service providers serving families
of missing or sexually exploited children
- Local psychological or psychiatric association referral services
- University departments of psychology or psychiatry
- Child- exploitation hotlines
- Child-protective-services agencies
- Rape-crisis or sexual-assault centers
- Family-court services of court-appointed, special-advocate (CASA)
groups
- Crime-victim-assistance programs in the law-enforcement agency or
prosecutor’s (district attorney’s) office
Working with Your Therapist or Physician
When you have located a therapist or physician, it is reasonable to
ask about his or her experience and training in working with a particular
problem. If you are not satisfied, find another professional. Even if
you pay a reduced fee or receive services at no cost, you have the right
to have a therapist or physician with the proper training and experience.
You may wish to express a preference for a male or female therapist or
physician.
Discuss your child’s situation openly, completely, and honestly. Trust
your feelings and your child’s feelings. Your child and you should feel
comfortable with the therapist or physician, even if the examination or assessment
process creates feelings of guilt or shame. If you are not comfortable with your
therapist or physician, discuss this discomfort openly. If this discussion does
not produce positive change, request another therapist or physician.
Provide a complete history so the professional is able to properly assess
and treat your child. Try to cooperate as fully as possible and help
the child cooperate with the therapist or physician. Ask questions
if you do not understand what is happening. Be open and candid in providing
information to the therapist about your child and family. This information
may be helpful in formulating a treatment plan.
Discuss the fees for examination and find out what services are covered by health-insurance
benefits you may have. Ask for a written statement explaining the basis for charges.
Your law-enforcement agency or district attorney’s office should be able
to tell you if your jurisdiction has a crime-victim-assistance program that will
pay for necessary counseling and medical treatment.
During an investigation of child sexual exploitation, therapy, or the
medical exam, you may be told there is no evidence of victimization.
There may be many reasons for the lack of evidence, but this does not
necessarily mean your child was not sexually victimized. And, conversely,
behavioral changes may have been due to causes other than sexual exploitation
such as a medical, family, or school problem.
Even if no physical evidence was found, the therapist or physician may
still be able to testify in court about the evaluation and discuss the
fact your child was exploited. It is important for the therapist to continue
seeing your child, even if the court does not find sexual exploitation
occurred.
Note: All
medical professionals and therapists have a code of ethics they must follow.
It is always wrong for any professional to be abusive or act in a sexual
way with a client. If you believe your therapist or physician is acting
inappropriately or is not keeping you informed about the assessment and
treatment, discuss your concerns openly. If this discussion does not produce
positive change, talk to his or her supervisor or contact a professional
or medical association for more help. Do not stay in a therapy situation
that makes your child or you feel uncomfortable.
Finding an Attorney
The services of an attorney may be helpful at any time during the investigation
of a missing- or sexually exploited -child case, but they are particularly
important if you are facing one of the situations noted below.
- Your child is the victim of family abduction and you need to obtain
a custody order, file criminal charges against the abductor, and encourage
law enforcement to investigate and the prosecutor to prosecute. Note: If
your child was taken to another jurisdiction, you may have to hire
a second attorney to enforce the custody decree in the jurisdiction
to which your child was taken.
- You are considering separation, divorce,
or dissolving a nonmarital partnership and want to prevent a family
abduction. Or, you want to stop visitation or are considering separation
or divorce because your child discloses sexual exploitation. Whether
or not you are legally married, you should have paternity established
and obtain legal custody of your child. To obtain a custody order you
must file legal papers, called pleadings, in the family court. It will
be much simpler to do this if you get the assistance of an attorney.
- You
want to sue someone who sexually exploited your child.
- You want to sue
an agency or institution that failed to protect your child from sexual
victimization.
Note: You do not need an attorney merely because your
child is testifying in a criminal case regarding abduction or sexual exploitation.
You may inquire whether or not your child will be appointed a guardian
ad litem or CASA to assist in the court process. Your child may also receive
assistance from a victim-witness advocate through the prosecutor’s
office. You may want to consult an attorney, however, if you have questions
the prosecutor or these other professionals are unable to answer.
What to Look For in an Attorney
Missing-child cases and cases of child sexual exploitation may have
complex legal issues. Parents and guardians should consider the items
noted below when hiring an attorney.
- Legal advice should come from an attorney only.
- Your attorney should be licensed to practice in the jurisdiction
where the case arose and/ or where any trial is likely to occur. Only
a lawyer licensed in that jurisdiction will know the applicable laws
in order to competently advise and represent you .
- If your child has been abducted by a noncustodial parent or guardian,
your attorney should be familiar with family/domestic-relations law.
You may also want an attorney experienced with the civil and criminal
laws applicable to parental kidnapping such as the Uniform Child Custody
Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act (UCCJEA); Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction
Act (UCCJA ); Parental Kidnapping Prevention Act (PKPA ); Hague Convention
on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction, if another country
is involved; and child-abduction lawsuits.
- If your child has been sexually exploited , your attorney should
be familiar with child-abuse and neglect investigations, the laws about
custody and visitation, and new procedures that may be used in trials
when a child is a witness. If a parent or guardian has been involved
in the exploitation, there may be issues surrounding child custody
and visitation.
- Your attorney should be experienced in conducting trials, especially
trials in criminal and family court. For example cases regarding child
sexual exploitation may require complex pretrial and trial procedures.
- Your attorney should be comfortable advocating for you outside of
the courtroom if necessary. For example an attorney may assist by encouraging
law-enforcement or other government involvement in your case.
- Your attorney
should be honest with you about the case. He or she should vigorously
represent your interests . Moreover, your attorney should treat your
child and you with courtesy and respect.
Where to Find an Attorney
The agencies and organizations noted below may be able to help you find
an attorney. If you cannot afford a private lawyer or otherwise qualify
as being eligible for free or reduced-fee services check with the agencies
and organizations noted below about whether they may help with your case
or refer you to someone who may be able to help.
- Nonprofit -service providers serving families of missing and sexually
exploited children
- Legal-aid office
- Organizations providing legal services to those with physical disabilities
or illness, senior citizens, or migrants/refugees
- Lawyer-referral services of the local or state/jurisdiction bar association
- Employer-based legal representation from unions, military, or prepaid
legal insurance
- Court Clerk’s office
- Legal directories
- Student legal services departments for those enrolled
in college or university
- Law-school clinics
Working With Your Attorney
After you have identified one or more possible attorneys , call for
an initial consultation. This is usually not expensive and sometimes
free. Describe your situation openly, completely, and honestly. An attorney
is not allowed to reveal what you say to him or her during your discussions,
even if you later choose a different attorney to represent you. You should
provide all the facts, including any documents, orders, or other paperwork
related to your case, so your attorney is able to properly advise and
represent you. Ask about your attorney’s experience and training
and, if you are not satisfied with the answers, discuss them further
or seek another attorney.
Trust your feelings, and choose an attorney with
whom you feel comfortable. When you have decided on an attorney, discuss the
attorney’s fees and court costs, and ask for a written statement explaining
the basis for charges. If the attorney quotes an hourly fee instead of a total
charge, ask for an estimated total based on past cases. Request a copy of each
document and correspondence your attorney prepares regarding your case.
Note: If
you have a complaint against your attorney, first try to resolve it with
a frank and open discussion. Remember every case has a “winner” and
a “loser”; you may be disappointed in the outcome of the case
even though your attorney represented you competently and vigorously. If
you believe your attorney acted unethically, you may make a complaint to
the appropriate bar association.
National Center for Missing & Exploited
Children
The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children® (NCMEC
) was established in 1984 as a private, nonprofit organization . Per
42 U.S.C. § 5773 and other federal legislation NCMEC fulfills 20
core federal mandates including the operation of a national, 24-hour,
toll-free telephone line by which individuals may report information
regarding the location of a missing child and request information about
the procedures necessary to reunite a child with his or her legal custodian;
operation of the national resource center and information clearinghouse
for missing and sexually exploited children; coordination of programs
to locate, recover, or reunite missing children with their families;
provision of technical assistance and training in the prevention, investigation,
prosecution, and treatment of cases involving missing and sexually exploited
children; and operation of a CyberTipline® for reporting Internet-related,
child sexual exploitation.
A 24-hour, toll-free telephone line, 1-800-THE-LOST® (1-800-843-5678),
is available in Canada and the United States for those who have information
regarding missing and sexually exploited children. The “phone
free” number is 001-800-843-5678 when dialing from Mexico and 00-800-0843-5678
when dialing from many other countries. For a list of other toll-free
numbers available when dialing from specific countries visit www.missingkids.com,
and from the home page respectively click on the “More Services” and “24-Hour
Hotline” links. The CyberTipline is available worldwide for online
reporting of these crimes at www.cybertipline.com. The TTY line is 1-800-
826-7653. The NCMEC business number is 703-224-2150. The NCMEC facsimile
number is 703- 224-2122. The NCMEC web site address is www.missingkids.com.
For
information about the services offered by NCMEC’s other offices,
please call them directly in California at 714-508-0150, Florida at 561-848-1900,
Florida/Collier County at 239-566-5801, Kansas City at 913-469-5437,
New York/Buffalo at 716-842-6333, New York/Mohawk Valley at 315-732-7233,
New York/Rochester at 585-242-0900, South Carolina at 803-254-2326, and
Texas at 512-465-2156.
A number of publications, addressing various aspects
of the missing- and sexually exploited-child issue, are available free-of-charge
in single copies by contacting the National Center for Missing & Exploited
Children at Charles B. Wang International Children's Building, 699 Prince
Street, Alexandria, Virginia 22314-3176, U.S.A.
Copyright © 1990
and 2009 National Center for Missing & Exploited
Children . All rights reserved.
This brochure was originally prepared
by the National Center for Missing & Exploited
Children (NCMEC); National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse; and
Center for the Study of Trauma, University of California, San Francisco.
Many thanks to Daniel D. Broughton, M D , Mayo Clinic; David Lloyd, J
D , formerly with the National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse;
the late Christopher Hatcher , PhD, Loren Brooks, Ph D , and Cole Barton,
Ph D , Center for the Study of Trauma, University of California at San
Francisco; John B. Rabun, Jr., Executive Vice President and Chief Operating
Officer, ACSW, NCMEC; Michelle P. Spring, formerly with NCMEC; Peggy
Zimmer, NCMEC Counsel, Litigation; Preston Findlay, NCMEC Counsel, Missing
Children Division; and Marsha Gilmer-Tullis, Director of NCMEC’s
Family Advocacy Division.
This project was supported by Grant No. 2009-MC-CX-K002
awarded by the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention,
Office of Justice Programs, U.S. Department of Justice. Points
of view or opinions in this document are those of the author and do not
necessarily represent the official position or policies of the U.S. Department
of Justice . National Center for Missing & Exploited
Children®, 1-800-THE-LOST®, and CyberTipline® are registered
service marks of the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children.
NCMEC Order #30.
At the time this brochure was originally written the
National Resource Center on Child Sexual Abuse was an information, training,
and technical-assistance center designed for all professionals working
in the field of child sexual abuse.
At
the time this brochure was originally written the Center for the Study
of Trauma was the only university center devoted to the study of abduction
and disappearance. The Center’s research implemented a systematic
approach which recognized problems of abduction and disappearance required
analyses from the perspectives of psychology, criminal law, civil law,
and sociology.
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