Know the Rules
Did You Know...
Girls are at serious risk of being sexually victimized? Some people
think it only happens to little kids. Well it doesn’t. It may happen
to your friends, people you know at school, and you. If it happens to
you, talk about it with an adult you trust.
What Is IT?
Did you know adults who abduct and victimize kids mainly do it for
two reasons? You know what they are? They are control and sex. And you
may have already figured out some people you know, adults and even guys
your own age, could be interested in you for the same thing.
Here are some FACTS
- 67% of all victims of reported sexual assaults were younger than
181
- Females were more than 6 times as likely as males to be the victims
of reported sexual assaults2
- Adult offenders assaulted 63% of juvenile victims3
- The average victim of abduction and murder is an approximately
11-year-old girl, who is described as a ”low risk,” ”normal” kid
from a middle-class neighborhood with a good family relationship
who has initial contact with an abductor within a quarter mile of
her home4
So How Can You Stay Safer? KNOW THE RULES.
There are rules to live by. Rules that remind you, like a little voice
inside you that says "HEY, do I really want to do this? Do I really want
to go there?" These are your rules for life.
So What Are THE RULES?
- DON’T GO OUT ALONE
- ALWAYS TELL AN ADULT WHERE YOU’RE GOING
- IT’S YOUR BODY
- SAY NO IF YOU FEEL THREATENED, AND TELL A TRUSTED ADULT
We know, these rules are pretty BASIC, pretty common sense. Yeah, yeah,
you’ve heard them a million times, but have you ever really LISTENED
to them? Have you ever really thought about what they mean? We are going
to talk about three girls. You may be thinking,
”I know this stuff, but it can’t happen to me.”
Well it can happen to you and girls like you, just like it happened to
these three girls. Here are their stories.
Laura Smither - Friendswood, Texas
Laura was a bright, loving 12-year-old who trusted her friends. She
was cautious about strangers and new situations. She was smart and
aware of her surroundings, which made her kidnapping unthinkable to
her friends. She lived in a small town where everyone felt safe, in
a neighborhood where everyone knew each other. Crime is often like
that—we always
think that it happens somewhere else. After the abduction several friends
told Laura’s parents, ”If this could happen to Laura, of
all people, it could happen to anyone. It could happen to me!”
One morning as her mom was making breakfast, Laura went out alone
for a quick jog in her rural neighborhood. She never returned. A massive
local, regional, and national search was conducted for her. Laura’s
remains were found 17 days later about 20 miles from her home.
What can we learn from Laura’s story? She was wise and careful,
and, like her friends, she thought that she was safe in her own hometown.
That’s the way we all want to grow up, but we have to KNOW THE
RULES.
Rule #1
Don't Go Out Alone - Think About It before you go.
Remember if you avoid situations that may put you at risk in the first
place, you’re already one step ahead.
Maria de Los Angeles Martinez —
Phoenix, Arizona
Maria de Los Angeles was 17 years old in 1990 when she decided she
wanted to earn some extra money. So she advertised over a local radio
station in Phoenix for a babysitting job. A man responded to her ad,
he picked her up one morning, and she has not been seen since.
Rule #2
Always Tell An Adult Where You're Going - Not long
after the man picked Maria de Los Angeles up, she made a telephone
call to her parents asking them to come and get her, but before she
could give them an address, the telephone was disconnected. Again,
THINK ABOUT IT. NEVER, EVER go somewhere with someone you don’t
know. This includes hitching rides. This includes babysitting for anyone
without getting information about the family like where they live and
references about them FIRST. Leave a telephone number and
an address with your family BEFORE you go.
Summer Nix — Spartanburg, South Carolina
Thirteen-year-old Summer started surfing the Internet with a 15-year-old
girlfriend. When her friend met an older guy in a chatroom,
Summer thought it was an online game. But then her friend to plan
to run away with the older boy and pressured Summer to join them. Summer
and her older friend hit the road with their newfound 18-year-old cyberpal.
It was a journey Summer will never forget.
It took 72 hours for Summer to realize she’d made a big mistake
and wanted to go home. She called law enforcement from a pay telephone
to ask for help. Summer is safe, but wishes she'd followed she’d
followed her own intuition. All she left behind when she ran away was
a handwritten note to her mom apologizing and promising she’d be
back.
Rule #3
It's Your Body - Girls face a lot of situations today
that put them in uncomfortable spots. You’re constantly having
to make decisions for yourself and are faced with peer pressure about
anything from who your friends are—male or female—to exposure
to drugs and sex. One more time, THINK ABOUT IT. And think about what
you post and do online. Once it's out there, you can't get it back.
Rule #4
Say No If You Feel Threatened, And Tell A Trusted Adult -
Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. Listen to your intuition
and follow your best judgment. If your friends are making bad decisions,
you don’t have to go along. Have the confidence to say NO if
anyone makes you feel uncomfortable about anything. And remember, it’s
never too late for you to tell an adult if anything is bothering you.
According to the U.S. Department of Education, in the United States
23 percent of nursery school children use the Internet, 32 percent
of kindergartners go online, and by high school 80 percent of children
use the Internet.5 Visit the National Center for Missing & Exploited
Children’s websites at www.cybertipline.com,
www.missingkids.com, and www.NetSmartz.org to download
free safety tips, view activities for and real-life stories about teens
who encountered risks on- and offline, and report the sexual
exploitation of children. Or call 1-800-843-5678 to make a report or
request free brochures and information about cybersafety.
You Know Whats Going On
Now you know the rules. You may have always known them,
but now you really get them. They’re like bells
that go off in your head when you’re faced with a risky situation.
They aren't able to get you out of every tough spot, but they might keep
you from getting into one.
We know you’re SMART and STRONG and ready to TAKE ON THE WORLD.
Go do it, just use your head FIRST. Know the rules. From now on, these
are your rules for life.
DON’T GO OUT ALONE
There is safety in numbers and this rule isn’t just for little
kids, it applies to everyone. We are always safer if we take a friend,
sister, or brother.
ALWAYS TELL AN ADULT WHERE YOU’RE
GOING
Letting someone know where you’ll be at all times is smart. If
you’re ever faced with a risky situation or get into trouble, your
family and friends will know where to begin looking for you.
IT’S YOUR BODY
You have the right to reject unwanted and inappropriate attention such
as teasing, touching, and bullying. And you’re in control of the
image you project to the rest of the world.
SAY NO IF YOU FEEL THREATENED, AND TELL
A TRUSTED ADULT
If someone — anyone — touches you in a way to make you feel
uncomfortable, you have the right to say no. Whether it is peer pressure
about sex, drugs, or doing something you know is wrong, be strong and stand
your ground. Don’t be afraid to make your feelings known.
Cites for Statistical Research
1According to Howard N. Snyder in Sexual
Assault of Young Children as Reported to Law Enforcement: Victim, Incident,
and Offender Characteristics, Washington, DC: National Center
for Juvenile Justice, July 2000, page 2, based on National Incident-Based
Reporting System (NIBRS) data studied from 1991 through 1996, 32.8%
of reported sexual assaults were committed against those who were 12
to 17 years old, 20.1% of reported sexual assaults were committed against
those who were 6 to 11 years old, 14.2% of reported sexual assaults
were committed against those who were 18 to 24 years old, 14.0% of
reported sexual assaults were committed against those who were 5 years
old or younger, 11.5% of reported sexual assaults were committed against
those who were 25 to 34 years old, and 7.4% of reported sexual assaults
were committed against those who are older than 34, accessed August
5, 2009, at www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/pub/pdf/saycrle.pdf.
2Id., page 4.
3Howard N. Snyder and Melissa Sickmund. Juvenile
Offenders and Victims: 2006 National Report. Washington, DC: National
Center for Juvenile Justice, March 2006, page 33, accessed August 5,
2009, at http://ojjdp.ncjrs.gov/ojstatbb/nr2006/downloads/NR2006.pdf.
4Katherine M. Brown, Robert D. Keppel, Joseph G. Weis,
and Marvin E. Skeen. CASE MANAGEMENT for Missing Children
Homicide Investigation . Olympia, Washington: Office of
the Attorney General, State of Washington, and Office of Juvenile Justice
and Delinquency Prevention, Office of Justice Programs, U.S. Department
of Justice, May 2006, pages x and 14, accessed August 5, 2009, at www.atg.wa.gov/uploadedFiles/Another/Supporting_Law_Enforcement/Homicide_Investigation
_Tracking_System_(HITS)/Child_Abduction_Murder_Research/CMIIPDF.pdf.
5U.S. Department of Education, âRates of Computer and Internet
Use by Children in Nursery School and Students in Kindergarten through
Twelfth Grade: 2003,â in Issue Brief, October 2005, page 1, NCES 2005111rev,
accessed July 22, 2009, at http://nces.ed.gov/pubs2005//2005111rev.pdf.
This brochure was originally funded by the
U.S. Customs Service, U.S. Department of Treasury, which is now U.S.
Immigration and Customs Enforcement (USICE), U.S. Department of Homeland
Security. This project was supported by Grant No. 2009-MC-CX-K002 awarded
by the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention, Office
of Justice Programs, U.S. Department of Justice.
Points of view or opinions in this document are those of the authors
and do not necessarily represent the official position or policies of
the U.S. Department of Justice or Department of Homeland Security.
Copyright © 1998 and 2004 National Center
for Missing & Exploited Children. All rights reserved.
National Center for Missing & Exploited
Children®, CyberTipline®, and NetSmartz® are registered
service marks of the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children.
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